So, you’ve survived yet another holiday season, managed to keep the casualties to a bare minimum, and have taken down the decorations and lights (unless you’re the owner of that house on Washington that has decided that unplugging the lights is essentially that same thing as taking them down).
Well, before you move on to planning that ever so festive Mardi Gras Party, there is just one more thing to be done: writing thank-you notes. Yes, somewhere in between your mom making you sit down with your Star Wars® notepad and pencil to write a note to Grandma for the fuzzy pajamas and firing off an email to your manager for her gift of the very functional desk calendar, you have completely lost touch with the concept of simple thank-you notes. Now that you’re an adult, an email just won’t do and more is expected of you than scratching out, ‘Thanks for the present, you rock!’ And let’s face it, the giver took the time to either endure the crowds at their nearest Target® store or re-wrap a present they received last year. Whatever the case, a gift deserves a brief note of thanks.
Grandma might not say anything to you, but trust me; she and her friends are probably at this very moment sighing over how young people today just don’t have manners.
As extra motivation, I will also tell you the hidden secret of thank-you notes--they improve the frequency and quality of the gifts you receive. People like being appreciated, and if they feel you actually notice the nice things they do for you, they’re more likely to give an encore performance. However, do not use this as a strategy to avoid writing thank-yous to those who regularly give gifts you do not like. Every gift deserves a thank-you note, even the ‘Best of Clay Aiken’ CD you received from your crazy Aunt Barb.
I assure you, writing thank-yous is easier than you remember.
First off, go out and get yourself some stationery, plain note cards or a selection of attractive postcards, and the proper postage. Avoid the pre-inscribed ‘Thank You!’ cards in loopy script, as there are times you’ll want to write notes where the aesthetic feels all wrong (and let’s face it, they’re tacky). Also, you may want to use these same cards for writing a thank-you after that ever-so-important job interview. Some very fine stationery can be found at Crane and Co. and Papyrus in Cherry Creek Shopping Center.
Secondly, make yourself this special cocktail that I find delicious and makes this task all the more enjoyable.
1 ½ oz vodka
1 ½ oz PAMA pomegranate liqueur
½ oz fresh orange juice
¼ oz fresh lime juice
Shake with ice and strain into a martini glass.
Garnish with a sprig of fresh mint.
Now, with cocktail in hand we can move on to this very simple six-point formula to the proper thank-you. Please remember, though, that thank-yous should be hand-written. Do not type them, no matter how poor your handwriting may be. No excuses.
Greet the Giver: Dear Anna,
That was easy, right?
Express Your Gratitude: Thank you so much for the hand-painted wine glasses.
This first sentence seems like it would be the easiest, but is actually the most complicated. Beware the just writing trap. Don’t write ‘I am just writing to say’; that’s stating the obvious. If the giver is reading, clearly you have already written… write as if whatever you say is happening in the moment.
If you’re writing to thank someone for an intangible (such as them putting you up at their place while you were visiting for the holidays or for a dinner party you attended), define what the intangible is in a mature and gracious manner. In other words, don’t say, ‘Thanks for letting us crash at your place.’ Instead say, ‘Thank you for your hospitality.’ Don’t worry if it sounds too simple; the point of writing the note is to create a simple expression of a heartfelt sentiment.
Discuss Use: They are so unique and will surely get lots of use.
Say something nice about the item and how you will use it. You may have to stretch the truth (even to a little white lie) on some occasions. However, there is always some truth that can be extracted. Let’s say you hate the gift (as I did with the wine glasses, which will certainly never see the light of day in my house). How to say thanks? Just find one thing that is nice about the item and mention it – but don’t get carried away.
Mention the Past, Allude to the Future: It was great to see you at our Christmas Eve celebration, my thoughts are with you and your family and I hope you are well.
Some questions to consider here would be: Why did they give the gift? What does it mean to your relationship with the giver? Let the giver know how they fit into your life. If it is someone you see infrequently or some errant family member you have little or no contact with, say whatever you know, but keep it brief.
Grace: Thanks again for your thoughtfulness.
It’s not overkill to say thanks again.
Regards: Best wishes,
Simply wrap it up. Use whatever works for you: Love, Yours truly, With love. Then sign your name and you’re done.
What’s Not There:
Any news about your life. This isn’t the time to brag about your new job, your new boyfriend or girlfriend, or what’s been going on in your life the last six months. Save all of the other information for the next time that you run into one another at a social function or for next year’s annual Christmas letter.
One other thing to remember is the timing on writing a thank you note is important and should usually be done within a week of receiving the gift. However, do not let that deter you from writing a thank you note now for a present you received in December. Please remember, it is always better to be a little late with a thank you note than not to send one at all.
Scott Hargrove is a recent transplant to Denver from Seattle. Originally from Shreveport, Louisiana, Scott’s passion for gracious living and entertaining led him into event planning for non-profit organizations, corporations and individuals. Most recently Scott has assisted Project Angel Heart with several of their larger fundraising events. He is an event planner, caterer and consultant and can be reached through this publication or at firstname.lastname@example.org.